Crybaby - Cookie Treats Constitute "subconscious campaigning"

Only (and I do mean only) in West Michigan.
A loser [ed. /snicker] in Wyoming's City Council race plans to file a complaint with the Kent County clerk's office over a box of cookies.Roger Haynes is accusing former state Representative Joanne Voorhees of subconscious campaigning by leaving cookies at an elementary school. He claims the gesture breached state law that prohibits campaigning within 100 feet of a polling place on Election Day.

Oooookay. I wonder if Haynes prayed that he would win; would that constitute supernatural campaigning? Considering he lost by 106 votes (with 1412 cast), those are some damn good cookies. [source, but good luck.] Side bar: WOOD-TV, seriously, we need to talk about your website.

Of course, the article leaves out some important details. Was it clear to voters that Voorhees had left the cookies? Were there cookies enough for everyone, or did those all-important 106 voters become influenced at early polls? And, since she brought windmill cookies, who's dumb enough to be influenced by that crap? Seriously, have you ever had a windmill cookie? *Phftooey*

WOOD TV8 - Wyoming City Council candidate cries foul over opponent's cookies


  1. It would be a mistake to underestimate the power of good cookies, especially good home-baked cookies, one of the most powerful forces in the known universe.

  2. I suppose there is some truth to that. As long as your political ambitions are fairly small, this could be a good tactic. Doesn't seem that it would scale well, though. Can you imagine the amount of cookies Ron Paul would need just to get nominated?

  3. Actually, if the loser guy really wants to make a point of this, the next time he runs against Joanne Voorhees he should provide free condoms to election workers... with little windmills on them.

  4. Oh, that's deliciously funny.


What is that noisy IoT device on my network?

That's the first question that popped up when I installed AdGuard Home on my Raspberry Pi last night. Within minutes, hundreds of querie...